


The Top of my To-Do List

by imamaryanne



Category: Crazy Ex-Girlfriend (TV)
Genre: Bisexual Nathaniel, Fit Hot Guys, Friends With Benefits, Let's Have Intercourse, M/M, PWP, season three
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-09
Updated: 2018-04-09
Packaged: 2019-04-20 18:53:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,617
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14267409
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imamaryanne/pseuds/imamaryanne
Summary: After failing to pick up anyone at the gay bar, Nathaniel and White Josh head back to Nathaniel's house. Things happen after Nathaniel sings a reprise of Let's Have Intercourse to woo Josh.





	The Top of my To-Do List

**Author's Note:**

> This work takes place in season three episode 9, Nathaniel Gets the Message. It assumes that Nathaniel never met Mona and both he and Whijo left the bar together, both of them failing to find someone to hook up with. 
> 
> Also, FYI, I don't really ship these two (Whijo/Darryl 4-eva) but IDK, I just kind of wanted to write this. 
> 
> And also, this was not beta'ed and barely even proofread as I need to go pick my kids up from the bus stop. So, take it with all its errors and typos. 
> 
> [My tumblr is here](https://my-random-fandoms.tumblr.com/)

The bar was a bust for both White Josh and Nathaniel. Josh thought for sure he’d find a guy to pick up, and have a quick one night stand with to take his mind off Darryl for at least a little bit. Nathaniel was unsure at first, but after seeing the amount of straight women at the gay bar (Josh was right, there  _ shouldn’t  _ be that many straight women at a gay bar), he was confident in his ability to get laid and forget about Rebecca for one night. 

But here they were, back at Nathaniel’s house side-by-side on the couch and staring at the TV, not really watching the  _ American Ninja Warrior _ marathon that was on. 

“Want a beer?” Nathaniel asked. 

Josh shrugged, “That’s a lot of empty calories.” 

“Scotch?” Nathaniel said, pulling out a bottle of scotch. 

Josh rubbed his face in his hands. “This sounds pathetic, but I might actually be too depressed to drink.” 

Nathaniel fiddled with the scotch bottle, trying to decide if he wanted to open the bottle just for himself. Finally, not wanting to drink alone, he put it away and settled himself back on the couch next to Josh. 

The guy on  _ American Ninja Warrior _ reminded him a little of Josh. Muscled and built like a fireplug. He was kind of cute too. Nathaniel tilted his head, “You think he’s cute?” he asked Josh.

“That guy?” Josh asked, pointing to the TV. “I dunno. Not really my type.” 

Nathaniel thought about Darryl, and remembered Darryl’s complaints about Josh’s exes and how they were all old. Of course a guy on  _ American Ninja Warrior _ wouldn’t be his type.

Nathaniel shook his head to clear his mind. Why did he care what Josh’s type is? 

“Wanna work out?” Nathaniel asked. 

“What’s the point?” Josh said miserably. 

“What do you mean what’s the point? The point is we’ve worked out a lot these last few weeks, and we can’t let our bodies go now. We look like Gods.” Nathaniel flexed slightly.

“What’s the fucking point, dude?” Josh asked again. “Who cares if we look like this if we can’t even hold onto the people we love? Looking like this isn’t going to fix our relationships.” 

“Neither would picking up someone at a bar,” Nathaniel pointed out. 

“Yeah, but at least then I could be getting my dick sucked.” 

Nathaniel had a brief image of himself sucking Josh’s dick, but again shook his head to clear it out. That was ridiculous. “Come on,” he urged. “Just a little lifting to kick in some endorphins. Make us feel better.” 

Josh sighed, but hauled himself up from the couch and followed Nathaniel into his gym area so they could workout. But his heart wasn’t in it. 

Nathaniel kept trying to cajole him, but Josh’s workout was lackluster. 

Nathaniel took his own shirt off and began working out, almost manically. “Come on, dude. Let’s get fit. Let’s get fucking ripped.” He needed to focus on the workout and stop focusing on how much he suddenly and unexpected wanted his friend. 

“Hey,” Josh said, a little worried for Nathaniel now. “Slow down. What’s going on?” He took the bar that Nathaniel was bench pressing and put it back on the rack. 

Nathaniel was breathing hard and looking at Josh with wide eyes. “I think we should have sex.” 

“Uh…” Josh said, before laughing a little. “No offense, dude. But no way. No fucking way that’s happening.” 

Nathaniel sat up, “Why not?”

“Because I have a rule that I don’t have sex with straight guys.” 

“Really,” Nathaniel deadpanned.

“Listen, my sexuality doesn’t exist for you to play around with, okay? You don’t get to be a straight guy and come to me for a quick lay when you’re feeling sad that your girlfriend with the magic vagina left you. You don’t get to use me to prove that you aren’t homophobic, because you’re willing to let another guy give you a handjob. I’m not some item to be crossed off a bucket list. Make out with gay guy, check.” 

“Well, first of all,” Nathaniel began, “If we did make out I wouldn’t need you to cross it off my bucket list because I crossed that off my bucket list years ago.”

“What?” Josh said, expressing disbelief.

“Yeah, so don’t get a big head thinking that you’re the first guy I’ve ever thought about fucking. I made out with one guy in college, and went down on another guy just last year.” 

“You’re bi?”

“Sure, if it helps you to label it.” 

“I’m not labeling like it's bad, some things just have a label. Mine is gay and I’m proud of it. I just assumed your’s was straight.” 

“I tend to be more into women. But there are times…...”

“That’s still counts as bi, dude.” 

“Okay, then I guess that’s what I am.” Nathaniel shrugged like it was no big deal to suddenly have a new sexual orientation.

“Okay, so you’re bi. But we’re friends and I don’t think we should do anything at all related to sex. I think we need to keep it platonic.” 

“Look,” Nathaniel pressed on. “We both went to that bar to get laid. Neither one of us did, and now here we are…..” He drifted off. 

Suddenly they were in a large room with arched doorways and a wooden floor perfect for dancing. Nathaniel was playing his guitar and wearing a tux. Josh looked around, confused for a moment, before realizing they’d been transported into a musical number. 

He checked out Nathaniel. The dude looked great in his fitted tux with the bow tie untied and in his bare feet. Josh looked down at himself. Oh, he was wearing the same exact outfit. He swayed a bit to the rhythm. 

Nathaniel stopped playing the guitar and began singing:

 

> _ I’m not kidding, I want to have sex with you _
> 
> _ I don't know what happened _
> 
> _ You seem really hot. _
> 
> _ For that reason, you're now on the top of my to-do list _
> 
> _ Let's get naked now _
> 
> _ So we can focus on Darryl and Bex _

 

Josh looked confused. But it felt good to be on the top of someone’s to-do list. He approached Nathaniel and began dancing with him.

 

> _ Let's have intercourse _
> 
> _ (Let's have intercourse) _
> 
>  

Josh almost laughed. Who used the word intercourse anymore?

>  
> 
> _ Acknowledge I'm seducing you _
> 
> _ Come on, let's quickly have intercourse _
> 
> _ (Let's quickly have intercourse) _
> 
> _ So we can move on with our lives. _
> 
> _ Our busy lives. _
> 
>  

Josh startled a bit when Nathaniel picked him up easily and danced while holding him. 

>  
> 
> _ You and I are both highly intelligent people _
> 
> _ And we’re both in excellent physical shape _
> 
> _ Once we do it, it'll be like _
> 
> _ Well, that's what that was like _
> 
> _ And we’ll go back to just being friends _

 

> _ But right now let's have intercourse _
> 
> _ (Let's have intercourse) _
> 
> _ I mean, hopefully you want to, too _
> 
> _ Just super quickly have intercourse _
> 
> _ (Super quickly have intercourse) _
> 
> _ It’ll be good exercise _
> 
>  

Josh shrugged. He supposed exercise was what solidified their friendship in the first place.

 

> _ Sometimes my body wants things and my mind agrees _
> 
> _ My body wants things that make my mind go "Uh, body please!”  _
> 
> _ We're animals, it's so fortunate _
> 
> _ So come on, let's contortion it _
> 
> _ I won't be back to normal till _
> 
> _ I see what your o-face looks like _
> 
> _ It’s probably a totally normal O-face _
> 
> _ I won't know for sure _

 

> _ Until we stop wasting time talking 'bout it _
> 
> _ And we super quickly _
> 
> _ It'll only take a second _
> 
> _ Have intercourse _
> 
> _ (Have intercourse) _
> 
> _ Let's have intercourse _
> 
>  
> 
> _ Good thing I happen to have an old condom in my wallet _

 

They were back in Nathaniel’s house, right by the home gym, staring each other in the eyes. 

Finally Josh took a breath. “First of all, who the hell uses the word intercourse anymore? Second of all….a musical number? You’re a lot weirder than I thought. You and Rebecca are probably perfect for each other.” 

“Thanks?” Nathaniel said, sounding unsure if that was a compliment. After all, Josh had participated in a musical number with him just hours ago at the bar. 

“Third,” Josh continued. “I don’t have “Intercourse,”” he used air quotes, “With people unless I’m in a serious relationship. Not, like true, actual sexual intercourse. With guys I’m just fooling around with, it’s limited to handjobs and blowjobs.” 

Nathaniel nodded, “Okay, let’s do that then.” He took a step toward Josh eagerly. 

“Fourth,” Josh took a step back. “I haven’t said yes.” 

Nathaniel stopped in his tracks, “Fine. We can go back to working out, or watching  _ American Ninja Warrior _ or you can head out. No problem.”

“But I haven’t exactly said no either.”

A smile spread across Nathaniel’s face, “You want to do this?” 

“Oh, I want to do it,” Josh agreed. “I’m just not sure it’s a good idea.” 

“We can still be friends. People do it all the time.”

“Do they?” 

“I mean, sure. Some people can.”

“Seems like straight people can’t.” 

“Yeah, but we’re not straight,” Nathaniel pointed out. “It’ll be so much easier for us.”

Josh nodded, his eyes losing focus as he stared at Nathaniel’s face. “Yeah,” he agreed softly. “So much easier for us.” 

Nathaniel stayed put as Josh closed the space between them and touched his lips to his friend’s gently. “Is this okay?” Josh asked. 

“Mmm-hmm,” Nathaniel hummed as he pulled Josh in closer, deepened the kiss and opened his mouth. 

But God, Josh was a good kisser. I mean, he’d heard Darryl talk lovingly about Josh’s kissing ability and at the time Nathaniel hadn’t thought anything about it. It was just a guy talking about the man he loved. 

But now, Josh was on the market and Nathaniel believed it was Darryl’s fault, so why shouldn’t he swoop in and see for himself just how good a kisser Josh was? 

Josh’s arms were wrapped firmly around Nathaniel’s waist, and Nathaniel ran his hands from Josh’s shoulders down his back and settled on his hips. They kissed like that for several minutes before Nathaniel tugged Josh into the bedroom. Josh followed him, eagerly tearing off his shirt, to match Nathaniel who’d taken his off during their workout. 

Nathaniel sat gingerly on the edge of the bed, but Josh didn’t want to do this gingerly, he pushed Nathaniel down and crawled on top of him, crashing his lips into Nathaniel’s and sinking his hips down. That elicited a groan from Nathaniel that went straight to Josh’s dick. 

Nathaniel squirmed into his expensive sheets. Josh was straddling him at his hips and giving bruising kisses. Nathaniel felt himself growing hotter and harder beneath him. He knew Josh could feel it as he hitched his hips to get better friction. Nathaniel loved this. It was exactly what he needed. Josh was all hardness and angles were Rebecca had been softness and curves. 

Josh pulled back, breathing hard. “Why are we still wearing pants?” he asked. 

Nathaniel didn’t answer but to unbutton his pants and pull them down to his ankles and kick them off. He used his toes to pull his socks off. His eyes never strayed from Josh, who’d stood up to remove his own pants. Nathaniel was waiting to see if Josh, more experienced in sleeping with other men, was taking his underwear off. Sure enough, Josh removed his pants and boxer briefs in one fell swoop, and Nathaniel’s eyes widened at the sight of stark naked Josh.

He’d seen Josh shirtless when working out plenty of times. And of course there was their musical number at the bar and they’d been nearly naked at that point. But seeing Josh standing there wearing nothing, his dick hard and at ninety degrees made Nathaniel feel like he was going to burst already. 

Josh watched as Nathaniel hooked his fingers at the top of his boxer briefs and slowly slid them down his legs. Nathaniel was trembling slightly, a flush growing across his body from head to toe. 

They made eye contact for a quick moment, before Josh returned to his position on top of Nathaniel. This time, their hard pricks connecting. Nathaniel inhaled, a slight hissing sound between his teeth. “This okay?” Josh murmured in Nathaniel’s ear. 

“Yes,” Nathaniel answered, his voice tight and drawing out the s. 

“This?” Josh asked, as he snaked a hand down and took Nathaniel’s cock into his hands.

“God yes,” Nathaniel said, trying to keep the desperation out of his voice. It was good. No, it was better than good, it was amazing. But it quickly became apparent that it was  _ too _ amazing and Nathaniel was going to come embarrassingly quickly. He put a hand on Josh’s and said “You better stop.” 

Josh grinned like he was happy he’d made his friend lose control like this. But he did stop and concentrated on continuing to kiss Nathaniel, working his mouth from Nathaniel’s swollen lips to his neck and down his chest. Gasping and trying not to thrust hard when Nathaniel reached down and grabbed his ass, squeezing and pulling toward him. 

Josh looked down at Nathaniel’s face and was pleased to see Nathaniel looking wild. His face flushed, hair a mess, and his eyes closed with a look of pure ecstasy on his face. Josh may not have been one hundred percent certain that they were doing the right thing, but it was hard to argue with that face. 

Josh leaned back on his haunches and held his hand out. “Sit up,” he order Nathaniel. 

Nathaniel took his hand and sat up, looking bewildered. It took only a second for him to realize that Josh was wrapping his legs around his body and sitting on Nathaniel’s lap. 

Their cocks were up in parallel lines. Josh thrust a few times before taking his hand and wrapping it firmly around both of their cocks at the same time. 

Nathaniel gasped. This was new to him. While Josh got a rhythm with his hand, Nathaniel attempted to move his hips to the same rhythm. It was hard though, with Josh sitting astride his legs. He was heavy, all muscle and manliness. 

When Josh started making throaty grunts, it was so hot and too much for Nathaniel to bear and he thrust hard one more time in Josh’s hand before coming, warm and sticky into Josh’s hand and covering the head of Josh’s penis. 

Josh grinned, looked Nathaniel in the face as he followed just ten seconds later. He kept stroking, but slower this time, slicking their dicks up with their mixed come. They both breathed hard, stopping to pepper each other with small kisses, before Josh removed his hand altogether and leaned back. 

They both caught their breath as they flopped down together on the bed, side by side on their backs. “That was….” Nathaniel said, handing some kleenex to Josh, who’d gotten covered by most of their come. 

“Yeah,” Josh agreed, grinning, wiping up his hands and his stomach. It was the first true smile Nathaniel had seen from him in weeks. The smile soon faltered. “It still sucks, though. Being without Darryl.” 

“I know,” Nathaniel said. “Same here.” 

“You miss Darryl too?” Josh quirked an eyebrow. 

Nathaniel laughed a little, “Same here with Rebecca.” 

They went quiet for a moment, still naked but not touching each other. They were staring at the ceiling, Josh’s hands clasped behind his head, and Nathaniel’s hands resting on his chest. “You regret it?” Nathaniel asked quietly. 

“No,” Josh said. He turned toward Nathaniel and propped himself up on his elbow. “We can be adults about this, right? This doesn’t change that we’re friends.” 

“No way,” Nathaniel agreed.

“Right, so what’s to regret?”

“Nothing,” Nathaniel said. 

One night. Two friends. No regrets. 


End file.
